For The Weary

I had raised my voice at my kids as I tucked them into bed because… well honestly, because they were being kids. And when I’m tired I wrongly expect them to act like adults and then get frustrated when they don’t. I then speak sternly to deliver my message and end the night on a terrible note, closing the door behind me. Not how I want the night to go and most certainly not how I desire to treat them.

Sigh.

Parenting can feel weary. Like a long road with no end in sight. Yes it is glorious and joy-filled and exciting – but it can also be very hard, very long, very unending. It can bring all the sin out of you again and again.

This particular night I left the room and slumped down defeated in another room, lights still off, and broke down crying.

Like cryyyyyying.

Have you ever had a moment like this? Where you just can’t hold it together anymore?

Let me tell you though, it felt so good.

I finally paused and poured out my emotionally exhausted heart to God and gave him all the things that were too heavy to hold.

(Why did I pick them up in the beginning?)

Remembering who God is and that he has purposes for all the things going on in my life was like putting down a backpack filled with bricks.

The difficult things we face are not things WE need to work out, strive for or labor through.

After all he is the potter, we are the clay.

These hard things in our lives are instead lovingly and beautifully crafted for us.

We’re gently invited to lean in to the hard things and watch him work – watch him sculpt and shape us into an even more dazzling reflection of himself.

And parenthood has been a sharp sculpting for me – in the best of ways. Because it regularly brings me to my knees recognizing how broken and weak I am apart from Christ.

As we face hard times, tiring times, things that feel insurmountable – let’s resist the urge to buckle down and try harder. Let’s cease trying to remedy and bandage our trials.

What if instead we paused, pulled off our work gloves, laid down our chisels and asked God:

“What do you have for me in this?”